Edward, Hubert, Ted, Alec, and Ringo

all the leaves are brown
and the sky is grey
I've been for a walk
on a winter's day

I'd be safe and warm
if I was in L.A
California Dreamin'
on such a winter's day

stopped into a church
I passed along the way
well, I got down on my knees
and I pretend to pray

you know the preacher likes the cold
he knows I'm gonna stay
California Dreamin'
on such a winter's day

all the leaves are brown
and the sky is grey
I've been for a walk
on a winter's day

if I didn't tell her
I could leave today
California Dreamin'
on such a winter's day


-California Dreamin' The Mommas & the Papas

Headline reads: Texas girl travels to a new state on vacation (finally) and decides never to return. Or something like that. Seriously? Isn't there an amendment on the ballet to rename California Utopifornia? If not, I will gladly sponsor one. I NEVER in a million years thought I would say this, but.....It was blissful not to be so darn hot!! That, and a few other observations, prompted me to write this blog examining the sanity in keeping good ole' Tejas in the 48 contiguous at all. WAIT! Put the lynchin' rope down just a gall darn second, wouldja ? Let's talk 'is out, k?

Observation #1 - People in California (based on my one time four day trip to San Diego) are in a state of Stepford wife-ish zombie-ness, in a good way. Here's the scoop: the hubs and I land. We get our luggage. We see the palm trees (instant hypnotic effect). We wander aimlessly but happily through the airport for an hour. We see my unimaginably handsome Navy boy who originated the idea for this trip. I scream and stomp my feet rapidly. I hug said Navy boy - we both may or may not have cried for a second. (Disclaimer: Navy boys soooo do not cry). It is then we realize that we will need a rental car.....Fast forward to the car rental place. See the lady tell us there's actually not a Jeep Wrangler in our price range. See her explain that the internet listed prices don't apply to San Diego due to the propensity for drug dealers & coyotes (not the furry sort) to drive them in and out of other countries. See her direct us out to a bench where a random gentleman will drive us to another car rental place where we can get a better deal. See us get in the car with the nameless gentleman does indeed drive us to an auxiliary car rental places with better prices. Convo ensues: Hubs: So, how long have you lived here? Unassuming driver guy: "Not long, maybe 14 years." Hubs: Do you like it? Driver: "What's not to like?"

Observation #2 - There didn't seem to be any California girls in California???? THEY WERE ALL NICE! I saw "Girls" in all shapes and sizes. They were on motorcycles. They were working on the Navy base (a blog in and of itself), they were walking down gloriously gorgeous boulevards, laying out on beaches, and even waiting tables in restaurants. None were tan. Few were overly highlighted. Only some were marginally blond. Most were my age. Most were riding bicycles on Coronado Island sans helmets because THERE ARE SIDEWALKS EVERYWHERE IN CALIFORNIA!!!

Observation #3 - San Diego has many, many, MANY nationalities encompassing it's make-up, but very, very few bugs. Hmmm? Yep! I said very few bugs. Here we have: mosquitos out the wazoo (in October & in a severe drought, no less!!!!), the ever popular "June" bug which manages to stay out waaaaaay past June, the cockaroacha (aka "Waterbug"), the dreaded fire ant, and CRICKETS (even in non-infestation years). California?????? WTH? We saw 5 (FIVE) freakin' flies and they WERE ALL NICE FLIES! We named them: Edward, Hubert, Ted (after my father), Alec (the hot fly), and Ringo. Don't ask. Again, all five were quite unobtrusive and were content to just look in on us from time to time, but never to light or disturb. Even the insects LOVE living in California.

Now, lest you decide to hold a dag nub trial and excommunicate me from Texas once an fer all, there were a few things in Cali that could use some improving: A) I was freaking' freezing the entire time!!!!! Holy shirts and pants! I wore a long sleeved sweater (the same one CONSTANTLY, since that's all I brought) every day and all day! B) EVERYONE rides a motorcycle. Actually, that's not a problem at all. The reason they do, however, is because there are ZERO parking spots in California!!!! Nada. Zilch. Zippty-do-da-day. I promise. Hotels - no spaces. Motels - no spaces. Holiday Inns - definitely no spaces. Those who do choose cars as chosen mode of transportation better be amazing at the parallel parking skill set. Still, it was beautiful, glorious, bug free (with minor exceptions), and very, very clean. But I don't want to live there.

Oh yeah, and we saw SEALS!!!! But, I still don't want to live there.

Oh yeah, and we saw DOLPHINS sooooooo close to the beach!!!!! But, I still don't want to live there.

Oh, yeah........never you mind. I have to go. There's a mesquite on my ankle that needs a good swattin'!